(Taken from John Goddards blog Content Flavoured Trousers)
1. A pretty damn good excuse I hope for your sake young man
2. Something really zietgeisty like a penetrating article about that Tippex digital thing everyone's wah wah wah wah-ing over
3. £20 Argos voucher for every reader
4. A few dark secrets
5. Range of mugs to commemorate the hiatus like
6. Sneak preview of "Russ Abbott's Nut Allergy Balloon Diary"
7. Some other crap I've been working on
8. A sexy ghost story
9. Exclusive extracts from my shocking new album
10. The ability to vote for one of the above in the Comments section
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